Alcohol Took It All.. The Job, The Car, The Apartment… and Almost His Family
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with Jared
What if the job that made you look successful… was actually the mask hiding your deepest struggle?
In this episode of Crosstalk, we sit down with Jared, a Bronx native whose life spiraled from teenage blackouts to losing a coveted New York City sanitation job, his apartment, his car — and nearly his family. What looked like confidence on the outside was fueled by shame, ego, and an inability to stop once he started drinking.
Through honest reflection, Jared walks us through rock bottom, relapse, family boundaries, and the unexpected power of starting over at Day One..
Success Can Hide Addiction
At 21, Jared hit what felt like the lottery: a secure career with the New York City Department of Sanitation, steady income, a new car, and his own apartment.
To everyone else, that meant he was fine.
But behind the paycheck were blackouts that started at 16, drinking and driving, arrests, and three second chances at work that he eventually lost. The job became proof he didn’t have a problem.
“If I make good money and I’m set for life… how bad can it really be?”
That illusion didn’t last.
When the job disappeared, so did the identity he used to protect himself from looking at the truth.
When Family Draws the Line
One of the most powerful moments in this episode is Jared’s father setting a boundary:
“We don’t want you here unless you’re serious about your drinking.”
It was tough love and it hurt. Jared felt abandoned. Angry. Misunderstood.
But that conversation became the turning point.
After years of outpatient programs, rehab stays, and failed attempts to control his drinking, Jared walked into recovery again this time fully broken and fully aware that he couldn’t do it alone.
“I can’t do this anymore. I need a ride to a meeting.”
Sometimes transformation begins when pride runs out.
Relapse, Shame & Starting at Day One
Six months sober… and the obsession never left.
Jared relapsed not because he wanted chaos, but because he didn’t know how to live without alcohol. The drinking wasn’t fun anymore. It was misery. Negative. Heavy. Hollow.
But something powerful happened when he returned.
No judgment.
No rejection.
Just “You made it back.”
That acceptance dismantled shame and showed him what real support feels like.
Recovery wasn’t instant peace. It was consistency. Meetings. Boundaries. Missing weddings. Protecting sobriety over popularity.
And slowly, identity shifted from “the funny drunk guy” to something deeper.
Sobriety Is More Than Stopping Drinking
As Jared reflects on 15 years sober, he explains that alcohol wasn’t the only problem it was the coping mechanism.
Without it, he had to confront:
Low self-worth
Performance based identity
Relationship patterns rooted in childhood
Anger he didn’t know he carried
Sobriety didn’t just remove alcohol. It exposed what needed healing.
And that deeper emotional work changed everything from friendships to marriage to fatherhood.
Practical Lessons From Jared’s Journey
This episode offers real-life insight for anyone struggling with addiction or supporting someone who is:
Success doesn’t cancel addiction.
You can have money, status, and still be spiraling.
Boundaries can save lives.
Tough love isn’t cruelty; it can be clarity.
Relapse isn’t failure.
Returning matters more than perfection.
Sobriety requires lifestyle change.
Sometimes that means skipping weddings, bars, and environments that feel unsafe even if people don’t understand.
Healing goes deeper than substances.
Real recovery involves emotional and relational growth.
Why This Episode Matters
This episode is for:
Anyone silently struggling with alcohol while appearing “fine”
Parents trying to navigate loving someone with addiction
People in early recovery battling shame or relapse
Listeners who think success protects them from self-destruction
Anyone learning that sobriety is the beginning; not the end of healing
Jared’s story reminds us that rock bottom isn’t always dramatic. Sometimes it’s quiet loss. Quiet shame. Quiet exhaustion.
But redemption is possible even after second chances run out.
And sometimes, all it takes to begin again is this sentence:
“I can’t do this anymore.”.
FAQs
Who is Jared?
Jared is a Bronx native, former New York City sanitation worker, and recovery advocate who shares his 15-year sobriety journey on this episode of Crosstalk.Is this episode only about addiction?
No. It explores identity, family dynamics, shame, boundaries, relapse, and emotional healing addiction is the starting point, not the whole story.Who will resonate most with this episode?
Anyone who has struggled with alcohol, loved someone who has, or is learning that healing means rebuilding life from the inside out and guidance are possible in life’s challenges.
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